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  Index › Teens & Children › Peer Relationships
   
 

Are You Being Dumped?

   
Author: Tonja Weimer
 

Does the one you want act like they don't want you? Is it real or are you imagining it?

When people tell me about the behavior patterns of their partner, and then ask if I think they are trying to leave, I am amazed at the signs they refuse to see.

Here are seven signs that your love interest may be dumping you:

* Shorter phone calls.

Does your love want to end your phone calls sooner than usual? Is it happening more and more? When someone knows they want to end a relationship but haven't yet done it, they will not stay on the phone.

* Distance.

Does he or she go away to visit other people or places more than they used to? Or have they "gone away" by not listening to you as much as they once did? When someone no longer asks questions and puts distance between you...emotional and physical...this indicates they want to leave.

* No future talk.

If he or she no longer wants to make plans for the future, including what you might be doing for the weekend, they are not planning a "future" with you in mind.

* Needing space.

When someone says, "I need my space," these are more than just words.

* Not knowing where they are.

If you are often wondering where your love interest is and how they are spending their time, and you have to ask them, they obviously are avoiding you.

* The direction of their toes.

Body language speaks louder than words. If your love is talking to you but not facing you; if their toes and heart are pointing in another direction other than towards you, pay attention.

* Non-communicative.

If your partner used to share and now they don't; if they used to be interested in your day and now they don't call you to find out how you are or how it went; and if their answers are so brief, you can't feel a part of their life, they want out.

If the above seven signs exist in your relationship, it is time to have the hard conversation with your love. Ask them what they want in your relationship. If they turn that question into, "Well, what do you want?" they are waiting for you to do the breaking up.

Tell them it doesn't work for you anymore. But most of all, remind yourself that you deserve a real relationship, not an illusion. And then, get some help to discover all the good and great things about you that you might have forgotten or may have never known.

You aren't being dumped. You are being given a wakeup call that there is something more for you out there.

 
 
 

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